If These Thighs Could Talk!

November 2007 - If These Thighs Could Talk!
Amy is the mother of 13-year-old Emily. Just like her mother and grandmother, Emily is "pudgy." Amy knows the horror of being the fat girl in High School and doesn't want Emily to have to go through that terrible, self-esteem destroying experience. She tries to help Emily by keeping snacks out of the house and preparing low-fat meals. She is very careful to not mention appearance, but centers all weight-loss talk around health.

One Saturday morning as she is preparing breakfast for Emily (1/2 grapefruit and Special K with skim milk), she finds a cookie bag and an ice cream carton in the trash can. She remembers seeing Emily sneak up the stairs to her room with a grocery bag under her arm last night. Amy's emotions take over and she storms up the stairs and throws open the door to Emily's room.

"Young lady, have you no self-control?! Do you want to look like a pig? You will never have any friends or get a date if you don't lose that disgusting flab! You are going to get on that treadmill (she points to the dusty machine in the corner that is covered with clothing) and you're not getting off until the meter says you've burned 1000 calories." Amy leaves the room, slamming the door behind her and stands gasping for breath in the hallway as the tears run down her plump cheeks.

Of course, Amy's "strategy" isn't going to be very effective. Emily is well aware that society does not approve of her. She was also well aware that her mother didn't approve of her, even before Amy "blew up!" Though the strategy isn't effective, its understandable given our society's current obsession with fat.

All of the terrible things that Amy said to Emily, are things that I've heard women say ABOUT THEMSELVES. If it would be damaging to say those things to your 13-year-old daughter, isn't it just as damaging to say those things to yourself?

Do this: Stand naked in front of a mirror (I can already hear the groaning! If this is painful for you, what does that tell you? If you weren't even willing to look at your 13-year-old daughter, what message would that send her?) Stand naked in front of a mirror and write down all the things you typically say about your body - flabby thighs, cellulite, fat belly, saggy breasts, stretch marks, wrinkles, disgusting, whatever it is. Say it all, write it all down, spill your guts all over the paper.

When you've exhausted everything you want to say to your body, put the pen in your OTHER hand (your non-dominant hand) and allow your body to respond. If your thighs could reply to you what would they say? If your belly could talk, what would it tell you? Your breasts, your wrinkles, your cellulite, give them a voice. Is your body ashamed? Is it angry? Using your non-dominant hand will allow your GenuineYou to express herself. Have a conversation with yourself and see what shifts in your attitudes.

If you're ready to create a healthier and happier relationship with your body, contact JoLaine now for a FREE coaching call and find out how GenuineYou coaching can change your life!

JoLaine Jones is a Wellness Life Coach, helping women love their bodies and love their lives! Find out more at GenuineYou. contact JoLaine