Teaching a Toddler Manners

Inquisitive and active toddlers are really not concerned with being polite. They want to test things, experiment, experience and learn all that they can, at every waking moment. Parents have to deal with high demands, physical and emotional, while trying to instill the values that they want their children to grow up with.

Teaching manners becomes is important for developing higher emotional functions such as respectfulness, responsibility and gratitude. Children will not automatically learn these things unless they are properly introduced by the parents. Teaching your child manners is a logical place to start.

The first thing to do is to be a good role model. Make sure that you are demonstrating good manners at all times. Most children will model the behavior and pick up a lot on their own. Use the word "please" when you ask them to hand you something. Deliberately annunciate "thank you" when they give you a toy, a blanket, or a piece of food. Use other adults to demonstrate "you're welcome" if your toddler is not saying "thank you" yet.

Some children take very well to manners, especially if you treat it like a game. Hand a toy, food, book, really anything, back and forth practicing your manners. Make it a point at meal time to talk about what good manners are. Ask your toddler if they can show you some good manners and have them demonstrate different things. Say things like, "We can put our napkins in our laps to show our good manners!"

Use phrases that include you and the child in the sentence, saying "we" instead of "you". This will make the child feel like you are playing a game with them, not just telling them what to do. Involving the whole family is a good idea. Don't let on that this is a lesson that needs to be learned. Really get creative. Lead by example and make it as fun as possible. Sing your "pleases" and "thank yous", or make an exaggerated face to accentuate the fact that you are using your good manners.

Learning manners leads to a positive self-image, confidence, gratitude and a sense of purpose. You can take all of these good feelings and lessons and turn them into an easy way to teach the toddler responsibility.

Once again, involve yourself and the family in teaching the rituals of chores. Toddlers can learn early on to like certain household chores. Chores and manners really do go hand in hand, because being responsible around the house is respectful to the other family members. For example, it is polite to hang your coat when you come in as opposed to throwing it on the floor where someone might trip on it.

You can teach your child to hang their own clothes on baby hangers or children's hangers. Toddlers usually think that this is fun because they want to model your behavior, but using regular clothes hangers can make it too difficult and frustrating. Invest in some infant hangers to ensure that the child doesn't get turned against laundry chores early on.

Toddlers can also help with dusting, picking up and organizing toys, and making their bed. Make sure that you participate, practice your manners, make it fun, encourage, and verbally reward the toddler over and over again. Instilling these values early on can have a lifetime of benefit for your child.