Teenage Dating Does Not Mean Having Sex

This might well seem like an odd thing to say but many parents do not realize how essential it is to teach teenagers that dating and sex are not the same thing. Believe it or not all too many teens simply presume that sex is a normal part of dating and even a glance at television and magazines aimed at teenagers gives a clear idea of why this is the case. Do not just assume that your children appreciate the difference between dating and sex and ensure that you clearly communicate this message to them.

Try to teach your children the distinction between dating and sex from a young age and emphasize this message often. In particular, help your teenagers to learn that dating involves getting to know the other person emotionally and not merely physically.

Teenage children will often have a 'single track mind' and you will have to suggest other things for them to do when out on a date rather than just focusing their attention on having sex. This might appear silly but you will be amazed at how often teenagers opt for sex as an option just because they are bored and cannot come up with anything better to do. So, as peculiar as it might appear you really will have to recommend things that your teenage children can do on a date to have fun. If you can get them to keep busy enough then they will almost certainly have to say no less often.

A number of parents instruct their children on how to go about saying no to sex and equip them with a long list of excuses or one-liners. The is all well and good but a one-liner only tends to work once and simply brushing off the suggestion with a one-liner is simply putting the question off in the short term and leaving the door open for the suggestion to keep coming up time and again. The answer therefore is to instruct your child to simply say no clearly and firmly and that, though they might wish to give a reason, they should not have to do so and simply saying no ought to be enough.

If you find yourself in the position in which a child has already had sex then you could believe that it is too late to talk to them about saying no. Nothing could be farther from the truth. A lot of teens believe that once they have had sex with someone they cannot reasonably refuse to do so again. The fact that they have had sex however does not mean that this issue can simply be 'ticked off' their development list and you must let them know that they they are free to refuse sex if they feel uneasy. You also need to talk to them about the fact that engaging in sex should always be something of significance and special and that a great deal myth surrounds the importance of their initial sexual encounter.

While you are talking about the importance of building relationships which are based upon a lot more than just sex, it is also vital to combine this with instructing your children about safe sex. However much you might want to do so you are not always going to be able to stop your teenagers from engaging in sex. Nevertheless, you can provide yourself with some peace of mind by trying to ensure that your teenagers stay safe, even when they choose not to listen to your advice to stand up for themselves and make wise choices.

Parenting4Dummies.com provides tips on parenting and covers a wide range of topics including teen advice about sex