• An expert in their chosen field
• Have the right approach
• Be consistent in their work

In these circumstances you will need a divorce attorney who has at least half their workload in this area and one that is able to act as a mediator. It also follows that you feel comfortable with them and feel confident they will serve you well.

Adversarial attorneys will use the hammer to crack a walnut approach which often happens when these cases go to court whereas an attorney who specializes in mediation will take a much calmer approach. Although there will be tasks you need to perform on your own, if you need to speak to your divorce lawyer, write down exactly what help you want from them.

Make sure you know exactly what you intend to ask and record the answers as each time you contact your lawyer there will be a charge involved so note times dates and durations of conversations. As all costs relating to law and legal advice are costly, try not to visit them at the office unless absolutely necessary; this can be achieved by using the phone or mail.

Your divorce attorney is just a resource for legal matters so do not try to get them personally involved as that is not their function; if you need emotional support there are others who can help with this. The behavior of your spouse, unless pertinent to the divorce, is of no concern to your divorce lawyer and will only distract them from the task at hand.

You really want your lawyer to know that you are in control and in charge of what is going on and that they are to help you with legal and technical issues and not to get your life straight. You are employing them for their experience but at the same time you need them to understand that it is your divorce and you want to make the decisions about how it is too proceed. You must also let them know that you expect copies of all correspondence to be sent to you for you own records and if you contact them by phone, you expect a reply within one working day.

Instead of hiring a lawyer, it may be far more cost-effective to use the lawyer just for information or advice on specific subjects like a marital settlement because that may be all the legal help you will need. In these circumstances you may only need to write down any issues you are unsure about and speak to your lawyer regarding those, and possible outcomes. Divorce lawyers can also help with marital settlements as well and do not need to be involved in anything more than this.

• A Specialist in this area
• Know which standpoint to take
• Be consistent in their work

You will need an attorney where at least fifty percent of their work is in this area and unless you're expecting problems, preferably one trained in divorce mediation that practices it professionally. They will need to be someone in whom you can place your trust and feel comfortable working with so if these criteria cannot be met then you will need to look elsewhere.

Mediation minded attorneys are more likely to give you problem solving advice, whereas traditional attorneys tend to be more oriented to conflict and their advice tends to be adversarial. Planning is all important and whilst there are things you need to prepare for, any contact with your divorce lawyer should be brief and to the point.

Costs are always an issue so write down everything you want to ask and in a logical order always making sure there is an accurate record of times dates and the duration of conversations. As all costs relating to law and legal advice are costly, try not to visit them at the office unless absolutely necessary; this can be achieved by using the phone or mail.

An attorney does not come cheap so use them only for the purpose you hired them for, legal advice, they are not there as an emotional problem solver, there are other professionals who specialize in that area. To get the best out of your divorce lawyer, leave any petty arguments you and your spouse have, aside from the divorce case.

Being in control of your own case and your own life is the single best thing you can do, so it is essential that you have a lawyer who can work on that basis. If they are there purely to act in accordance with the legal issue of divorce it will be more efficient utilization of their services and you will be making the decisions. You must also let them know that you expect copies of all correspondence to be sent to you for you own records and if you contact them by phone, you expect a reply within one working day.

There are instances when you may not actually need direct legal representation but may just wish to use the services of a lawyer for advice on legal aspects like a marital settlement. In these circumstances you may only need to write down any issues you are unsure about and speak to your lawyer regarding those, and possible outcomes. You may decide to have a divorce lawyer help with your marital settlement agreement, either to draft one or just to check over one you have made yourself then contact them if you get stuck or confused.

Alan Redman runs a site known as the Divorce Insider which looks at diy divorce