How many is too much?

Many men will write to only one woman because they actually think they found the right woman for them based on the profile. Prominent role in profiles is, of course, given to pictures, so basing a decision on such an approach is unreliable in the least. One cannot objectively get to know a person by simply looking at the photos, which do not reflect any personal qualities and character. Someone looking kind and simple in the photograph can turn out to be a snob in reality, a lady looking mean and unapproachable can turn out to be the most soft and gentle person when meeting face to face. If a lady is using a photographer, this can also create lack of correspondence between reality and the image in the picture. Each photographer has his/her particular style, and can ask women to strike a pose that will not reflect the way she is, present her in a different light, etc.
Besides, women usually select their best pictures for putting on a website. This means that a lady got dressed the best way she could, she spent hours doing her makeup and hair. She also might be wearing clothes that she would not typically select, which can cause erroneous misconceptions about a woman being conservative or, on the contrary, relaxed. Once the photo shoot is over, only the best pictures are selected; and of those, only the best ones will be selected by the agency to place on their web site. So, when it comes to meeting a lady, you might not even be able to recognize her, as she might wear jeans, t-shirt, much less makeup, etc., and if you have based your affection upon her looks only, you are very likely to be disappointed.


Questionnaires are also not a reliable source of telling you what a person is really like. Many agencies will have ready-to-fill-out forms, with little room to really express the way a person feels. Even when there is room to describe what a woman is looking for in a man, it is not a guarantee that the two of you will be a good match when you meet in person.
As a result, you end up falling in love with an image that you have created for yourself. This not only wastes your time, but can also make you seem unreliable and inadequate to the woman to whom you are writing. If you tell a lady that you were swept away by her pictures, and that she is the only one for you, she will consider you insane in the least. Saying that you want to build a future with her because she is beautiful will make you fall into the category of dreamers, which is what many Russian men are. Russian women, on the other hand, are practical and they clearly realize that a normal man cannot make a sound judgment based on a photograph; knowing that you found her photo attractive will convince her only of one thing - that you are looking for a beautiful doll, instead of a woman, whose inner world you want to discover. Even if you tell a woman that she is the only one to whom you are writing, you are not likely to score extra points, as many men hope. She will not be able to understand how you can make serious decisions based on so little information.

Writing to several women will, in fact, increase your chances of finding the right one. For one thing, you will have a chance to get to know more people, and have a more objective outlook on the women interested in you. Writing to several ladies who interest you can help you make a more grounded selection of the one you finally choose to build your future with. For another, knowing that you selected the Russian lady from a number of other women will make her feel more special and your offer for an exclusive correspondence more meaningful. Knowing that you chose her even though you had a chance to pick other women will make this more significant than if you tell her upfront that she is the only one you want to get to know (because you saw her picture); and if you continue to write her, she will know that you are still interested.
One of the main reasons men feel uncomfortable with writing to several women at once is because they think it means they have to lie to the ladies. However, corresponding with several ladies is no reason to be dishonest. Speaking realistically, both men and women correspond with several people in the initial stages of searching for their partner, and it is not something to be ashamed of. When engaging in correspondence with women you do not have to hide the fact that you are writing to other ladies. In fact, telling a Russian bride that you are interested in serious relationship and want to find the right partner for future, which is why you want to take time to get to know several people, will make you sound more serious and sensible. Make sure that both of you clear what to expect in your communication: agree upfront that both of you will inform each other if you decide your relationship is not working, or that you will both stop writing to other people if you decide you are right for each other. Talking about writing to other people will also show that you respect her choice, if she wants to select someone else.
Whatever decision you make, be sensible and realistic in your expectations.