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Successful Living in a RelationshipSubmitted by kajuba Thu, 16 Jul 2009
For anybody after a lasting happy love life, it is always important to start with an assessment of ones readiness in forming a sustainable and intimate union, from the time you started being engulfed in dating relationships, to the time you walk along the aisle. Devoid of this, there is the risk of putting oneself in a very precarious position of devastation which sets in after a relationship has collapsed and failed miserably.
Of even immense concern in a person's life is the risk of repeating the same things that made you fail initially, and they have the potential of leading into unhappy and ill-fated brief encounters. These will lead to a drastic decrease in the levels of self-esteem, lack of hope in ever living a happy loving life and the serious belief characterized by a feeling of incapacitated capability in finding the perfect soul mate. Starting dating relationships is depicted by readiness, which is depicted by some factors. Since love is a personal and deep thing, each one of us must be the one evaluating their sole feelings, dating experience, behavior, to perceive which area they should focus on. Readiness involves a number of factors. An internal audit of ones life, from feelings to dating behaviors, from whence one will know where to begin, what went wrong and what to really focus on. The first thing in living well is to never hurry up into any dating relationships that have ways of leading to something huge. Such gut reflexes as anticipation and fantasizing are some of the thoughtful behaviors that your body and mental reflexes might be warning you through, that there could be something amiss. This is because since you are lonely and unhappy, you could be rushing into a relationship simply to net a partner without weighing your options. This craving to have a person into your life could be a result of those kinds of expectations that you might have put upon age, desire to experience what many of your colleagues are enjoying, as you cruise in dating relationships or that inner desire to just fit into a marriage lifestyle which a family brings forth. The kind of environment for a stable relationship and its concurrent growth include a strong altitude, availability as well as other values and qualities which will present themselves ones your life is perfectly in order. A climate that is equal to instability presented by financial, family, work or personal problems will clearly lead to the hindrance of true sharing and openness. You will then be unable to communicate and vulnerable and lose direction. Never rush your way into any dating relationships, thinking that you will be able to fix most of these problems; you could worsen them and ingrate them into the core matter of your character. Instead, start addressing the issues now, such that a hindrance will never materialize in your endeavor to cultivate true intimacy now and in any other future relationship. Spend enough time on the issues. Always be clear that you recognize yourself as well as that which you want. This will allow your emotional energies that relationships building calls for. Before you date anyone, search for people with whom your goals and view s are compatible, with a positive sense that what you are doing feels right within you, make dating relationships sound fun. Never at any time ignore any deeper feeling which could be trying to tell you that you need to either slow down, or wait for some opportune moment, or simply the right person.
Francis K. Githinji Is A Researcher And A Writer on Life and Society Issues. His Latest Project Free Online Dating Service Shows How The Power Of Online Dating Can Be Harnessed Internationally and With Great Success, Or You Could Post Your Valued Comments On His Blog At Dating Relationship
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