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Home » Society » Marriage » Love Advice for Your Relationship

pfriedman
Article written by pfriedman

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Love Advice for Your Relationship

Submitted by pfriedman
Tue, 10 Feb 2009

Mankind is essentially spiritual. I don't even understand how people can discredit the unseen when they are aware of its presence all around them. We walk through a sea of air which cannot be seen. Radio waves that we cannot see are passing through us constantly. We're bombarded by atoms and neutrons and protons that are completely invisible. We scientifically understand the spaces that exist between the actual "matters" of even the densest materials on earth are big enough to drive a truck through. Yet we see, touch and feel them as if they are solid. Science has taught us the unseen is much vaster and varied than the material world we look at every day. There are colors we cannot see and sounds we cannot hear but we know they exist.
We can't see the wind but we can feel the wind so we know it is there. Similarly we cannot see love but we can feel love so we know it is there. Where does love begin and end? From where does love originate? Are you, as an individual, able to manufacture love? The answer is no, you draw love from an unseen source. In fact, I will state it quite candidly. We are in a perpetual infinite sea of love itself. When we seek love it is like a fish in the ocean seeking water. The very substance of love is the substance of the universe. But because we have free will we are able to close off that part of us which receives love and imagine it doesn't exist for us; but it does.
In the temporary confines of our human selves we lose sight of reality, the love that surrounds us. We imagine we have to find love and when we find the right person we give love. This world can be seen as a terrible place when we don't feel loved. We get into all sorts of mischief desperately seeking someone to love and someone who will love us in return. But there is a trick. The trick is to recognize relationships as a very specific reality within this unreality, a safe environment where we can give our love without fear. When we have established the relationship of a marriage or our intention to be married we agree to open our hearts so love can flow through without restrictions. As a human being you are capable of loving every single human being in the world. Why don't you? Somehow you have it in your head that if you love everyone and everything you become vulnerable, so you restrict yourself and feel the pain of the restriction. Now I'm not saying that you should become promiscuous or a flower child of the sixties. I am saying giving love is not the same as expressing love. When you are in a safe relationship, i.e. marriage, you can express love fully and that is in fact one of the purposes of marriage. The point is when you are in a marital relationship it is to your benefit to give love in as many great ways as you can imagine. When you do so you open up a channel within yourself and you are able to feel and receive the love you are giving.
We have all heard the expression that the more love you give the more you'll receive. It is a true statement but completely misunderstood. It isn't as people imagine that when you give love to others they will want to love you back. People love who they love, not those who love them. What the saying means is when you give love you are experiencing the love that is flowing through you. The fact of the matter is giving love allows you to feel love in more of an adulterated form. The love that you give is coming directly from the source of love, rather than the filtered version that comes from someone else. Does this make sense to you? So, interestingly, you receive far more love by giving it than by getting it.
We are essentially spiritual beings who thrive on love because love comes from the same source we come from: God. To deny God is to deny love and to deny love is to deny God. This is not a religious thought but rather a very practical thought that allows us to enjoy our existence. There is no greater enjoyment and feeling than love. So please remember to tell your spouse or your significant other, "I love you."

 

I wrote Lessons For A Happy Marriage to help people save their troubled marriage and end the marriage crisis in our country; it's about saving children. Let's stop divorce. The problems go beyond the failures of marriage counselors. My life's mission is to eradicate the need for divorce through focused education. If you're married, tell your soul mate, "I love you."


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