Living Humour: Squeezing the Juice from Life

Facts, oddities, incidental details: these are only some of the few things I examine in the following twenty features I have come up with concerning life and all its intricacies. Some will make you laugh, others will make you scratch your chin, but whatever your behaviour, each and every one of these twenty or so queries.

1) Ever used 3-second glue (or instant glue and super glue as it is called in some countries)? Why does it stick so quickly as soon as you squeeze it out but it doesn't stick to the sides of the tube from which you squeeze it out?

2 ) Academic research has detailed reports stating that from a group of four men or women one will most certainly have a mental ailment of some kind or the other. Think about this calculation: if you have three normal friends, then you, unfortunately are the fourth one out. In other words, the fourth person with a mental illness is none other than you.

3) If you have either a television or a Video Receiver or a DVD or anything that needs a remote controller, this odd behaviour is familiar. Have you noticed that whenever the batteries begin to get dull, we press down harder? Are we expecting to squeeze more out of them?

4) How come Tarzan has no beard?

5) How do bugs get into the enclosed and sometimes shut-tight light bulbs?

6) Why can't we ever manage to open a plastic bag on the first attempt?

7) Why, pray tell, do doctors just about to inject a prisoner with a lethal injection check that the needle is sterilized?

8) Have you noticed that if your bank account gets overdrawn, your bank will add an extra charge? Why do they do that? Should you maybe inform them that the reason your checkings account is overdrawn is because you don't have money?

9) Why don't we ever hear jokes about father-in-laws?

10) Why do people believe it when scientists say that there are about four billion stars, but feel they must check it if someone places a sign saying wet paint on a piece of furniture?

11) How many times will we return to the fridge even though there is no food in it and we know that from the previous time we paid a visit just minutes ago?

12) Even though superman is supposed to be invincible and bullets ricochet off his chest, why does he duck if the villain lobs the pistol at him when the bullets are over?

13) I'm sure you've heard of the evolutionary claim that mankind has evolved from monkeys. Before I am to believe this, I want to know that if this is so why are monkeys still roaming earth?

14) If you are sitting by a table and something is accidentally falling off, don't try and prevent its fall. Why? Every time you try, you will accidentally hit and break something else.

15) Heard of the Jap airplane pilots who towards the end of the Second World War crashed their planes into American naval ships? Why did these guys even think of wearing a helmet?

16) Why do people move a vacuum cleaner over a small piece of thread again and again. Why do we pick it up, examine it and then place it back down and move the vacuum cleaner over it to give it a second chance?

17) Bought red, pink or blue coloured soap? Why can soap have colour, but the bubbles are always white?

18) Why do we always try and get the house to be as warm as it was in summer even though we suffered from the heat in summer?

19) I have passed across many shops and marketplaces where they sell mattresses, and yet, I have yet to find one where the mattresses are not advertised as being part of a sale!

20) Sometimes we are just too polite! How many times have others run into us with their carts or even worse have smashed into out ankles? Instead of cursing or at least barking at them to watch where they are going, why do we just smile when they say sorry?

Note:
Uncanny facts and features are not novel. The fact that we humans have strange habits is not new too. But, I have pointed out some of the few irregularities that we live with. This article is for entertainment purposes alone and doesn't try and offend or create new realities. So, take it in the appropriate manner too.

About the Author

Games involving cards like gin rummy is what Rammy Johnson loves to do when he has the time. He doesn't frequent online casinos or that sort of thing, but when he can he visits grand hotels with his notebook and jots down oddities he notices there.

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